He pulled like he had never pulled before.

She was not going to win this time.

His High School letter jacket was a little tight in the shoulders. But that was just because he was more muscular, more broad-shouldered than he’d been in his teenage years. But his old jeans…

She had some nerve, alluding to the idea that he’d been “empathetically putting on baby weight” with her. She seemed to think it was a compliment.

A back handed compliment, maybe…

He tried some baby powder. That should do the trick.  He got both legs in, then pulled again.

How did women do it in those commercials? Lying down on the bed? Did that actually help?

He flopped on his back, legs flailing inside unforgiving denim. He clenched his dimpled butt-cheeks and yanked.

Finally, they were over his hips. Is this what she’d gone through every morning? The woman who had worn the tightest low cut jeans every day of her life till her baby bump began to show, heralding a whole new wardrobe?

He contemplated which of his friends he might trust to come over and zip his pants while he let all the air out of his body.

Not a single one. No way. No-one is going to see me like this. And no-one’s going to touch my junk.

“Come on, honey, you’ve almost got it!”

At the sound of her voice he raised his head, then acrobatically flipped… or rather flopped awkwardly off the bed, landing on the floor with a painful thunk.

“Oh, sweetie, are you OK?” she cooed, but she giggled too, and didn’t put the camera down.

She wouldn’t… she wouldn’t dare…

“Remember that video Roy put up on facebook? The one where you say I’m getting fat?”

She would.

She tossed the camera onto the dresser. All the air was forced out of his body as she plopped onto his stomach, straddling him. Not nearly as lithe as she’d once been.

But, oh, so much more beautiful.

“Now, see here? Here’s your problem…” she explained, perfectly imitating his own tone of voice whenever he looked under the hood of her car. She skooched backwards, accidentally squishing certain parts that were already rather squished. At least she looked genuinely sorry; her face formed that oh that she made whenever she stepped on someone’s toe or walked in on an awkward moment.. “Aw, is bubby all right?”

He decided not to be mad. Hell, he didn’t care if she posted the video on Youtube and got a gazillion hits. As long as she just kept doing what she was doing…

Bondage was not his thing. It never had been. But he had to admit, being stuck half in and half out of those old tight jeans while she had her way with him was worth it.

This was written in response to the Write On Edge prompt “jeans”. Women have had a love/hate relationship with the wardrobe staple for years, so I thought I’d see what it was like for a man to try and prove he could still fit into the same jeans he wore in High School.

The shortlink for this post is http://wp.me/p1rMYd-8c

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