By Dean John Lazzaro (Own work) [GFDL ( or CC-BY-3.0 (, via Wikimedia Commons

Adam’s hands only caressed Coryn’s waist for a brief moment before he grabbed the little muffin top that was peeking over her swim shorts. He pinched just a little too hard, making her wince instead of her usual giggle and swat. “What’s wrong babe?” he asked, scooping her off her feet, keeping her unbalanced both literally and figuratively in the deep end of the pool. He hadn’t noticed that she’d stopped responding playfully to his ever more careless groping two weeks ago, ever since the anniversary of their first date had passed without so much as a mention.

“You pinched too hard.” she answered honestly. Really, she didn’t want to be that girlfriend, the one who insisted on fancy dinners and special treatment just because of some date on the calendar. Although she was upset about more than just that one pinch, that was all she felt justified in complaining about.

“How about this?” Adam asked, manhandling her so she had to wrap her legs around him or risk drowning. He pinched her bottom hard enough to leave a mark.

“Ow!” Coryn complained helplessly as Adam’s friends laughed. It didn’t help that she could feel his erection, growing hard in spite of the cool pool water. She wanted to squirm into a better position, but squirming in her current position would only be interpreted as encouragement.

She was about to push away and retreat to her own friends, tanning poolside, but Adam switched his tone instantly, whispering low enough that his friends couldn’t hear. “I’m sorry, babe, you know I’d never hurt you…” he caressed her wounded backside in just the way she liked, and her libido overrode her brain. She’d meant to break up with him for a week now, but never found the right time. He always seemed to sense when she was on the verge, and came up with some sweet words or gesture that made her doubt herself.

A rumble from the west signaled rain, and sure enough large drops began to fall. The row of tanning women clutched their unfastened bikini tops against their chests and hurried off to their cars. The boyfriends followed, and the few guys who were unattached headed for the pool house.

Coryn started to push away but Adam kept her tightly against him, moving slowly towards the side of the pool while kissing her neck. “Adam…” she protested weakly. He wasn’t usually so affectionate with her in front of his friends.

“It’s just a little rain, Coryn…” he pressed her against the side of the pool. He fumbled with the tiny bit of spandex he was wearing and poked his erection against her swim shorts. “Why do you have to wear those things? What happened to the bikinis?”

She’d stopped wearing the bikinis the first time he called her “muffin” but he apparently never made the connection. “I like these. They’re cute…” Coryn had something else she wanted to say, but Adam was sucking on her earlobe while his hands ever so gently inched her waistband lower.

He almost had them down to her thighs when Coryn noticed his wing-man holding up a cell phone from the shelter of the bar, filming them.

Furious, she kicked him away. “You’re filming this? You jerk!”

She’d meant to direct the comment at the cameraman, but Adam’s the one who answered. “Aw, come on… we talking about making a video…”

Words failed her. The rain came down even heavier as she scrambled out of the pool.

“Don’t be a bitch, Coryn!” Adam called out from the pool, ignoring the rain.

Suddenly a large wave washed over the pool-house, overflowing the pool itself and leaving several inches of water all around the pool area.

“Adam?” Coryn called out, unable to see him.

“Woot! What a rush!” he yelled, hanging off the diving board. “That…” he didn’t finish the sentence. Another wave washed over the pool house roof, this one containing a huge, dark shadow. That shadow thrashed in the pool as the wave dissipated, knocking Adam against the side. Coryn screamed as the shadow flipped around in the pool, revealing itself to be a huge shark. Its jaws clamped onto Adam’s torso, ripping him in two before swallowing both pieces.

She screamed again and felt hands grabbing her and dragging her through the door and into the pool house.

Everything went fuzzy, and she was only half aware of strong arms lifting her.


When she came to, a familiar face hovered over her.

“Jamie…” she whispered groggily, touching his face tenderly. “Jamie!” she exclaimed suddenly, startling him enough that he backed away, tripping over a backpack and landing hard on the carpeted floor. Jamie, whom she’d broken up with a few months before she started dating Adam.

Jamie, to whom she owed a huge apology.

A loud crack sounded outside the window. She looked around, recognizing her friend Kate’s guest room.

“What’s happening?”

“Craziness…” Jamie said, picking himself up and hovering near the wall as if he was afraid to come near her. “There’s a water funnel over the ocean… it moved inland, carrying not just water but freaking sharks! It’s a tornado and it’s dropping live sharks all over LA!”

“Then I wasn’t imagining…”

“No, you weren’t. Adam… Adam’s gone. That shark’s still in the pool.”

“We have to…” Coryn tried to finish her sentence, but no words came out, only a squeal as her chest suddenly seized and she couldn’t breathe. Jamie tore himself away from the wall, gathering her close, cradling her and brushing her hair away from her face as she fought for calm that would not come.

Another loud crack sounded outside and the lights went out.

Coryn screamed, trying to grab his shirt but he was still wearing only his swim trunks.

She began shivering and he rolled her onto the bed, grabbing the comforter and bringing it up around her while she huddled against his chest. She couldn’t think straight. The one overwhelming thought was that she’d always been safe with Jamie. He’d always been gentle and protective of her. With him, when she felt helpless it never seemed like a weakness on her part. It seemed simply honest and…human.

Adam always made her feel weak.

They lay there in the dark together, and eventually she found her calm. Jamie had that effect on her. He smelled good, even after the chlorine had washed away any body wash or cologne. She missed that smell.

She didn’t want to pull away, but she pushed back enough so she could see his eyes. They were dark, the way they used to get right before he’d make love to her.

“Jamie…I should have told you this months ago…but…I know you didn’t cheat on me and I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.”

In the darkness she couldn’t tell whether his brows were furrowed in anger, confusion, or worry. “I should have trusted you. I’m sorry.”

Jamie placed his lips gently to her forehead. “It’s OK Coryn. We all believed a lot of things your sister said. But it was all just stupid teenage jealousy and she’s off to the east coast now.”

“Are we the only ones here?” she asked.

“No, Kate’s…”

“Kate!” Coryn pushed away, trying to scramble out of the bed but only succeeding in getting herself more tangled. Kate, her best friend, who was (with her blessing) dating her ex. Jamie.

“Oh, Kate can’t find us like this…” she said, trying to scramble out of bed.

Jamie grabbed her wrists in one hand, gently pinning them above her head while he half held her down with his body. “Kate knows we’re here. She helped me bring you in.” He released her wrists, trailing the backs of his fingers gently over her arm. It would have been so natural for him to continue down over her breasts, but instead he lifted his hand and placed it tenderly on her waist.

“But, you…”

“Kate was only pretending to date me so she could spend time with what’s-his-face. And I…”

“You what?”

“I went along with it so I could keep an eye on you. Adam’s a jerk. I’ve been waiting for an opportunity to plant my fist in his face without it landing me in jail, but I never got the chance. And I know his type… if I’d tried to warn him off, he would’ve just gotten worse.”

A loud crack from outside was followed by a pounding rattle.

“What’s that?” Coryn asked.

“Hail…” Jamie answered, climbing out of bed and going to the window. “But this place is a fortress, remember? Kate’s Dad, conspiracy theorist extraordinaire? Rich enough to build a freakin’ mansion out of concrete.” He reached up and pulled a cover over the windows. Suddenly it was pitch black.


“It’s all right Coryn. I just shut the storm covers. We’re safe.”

“Jamie?” she asked again as she started shivering. It was all just too much. She still couldn’t believe she’d seen a shark in her best friend’s swimming pool actually eat her boyfriend. If it had been anyone else telling her that a tornado was raining sharks all over Los Angeles, she’d never believe it.

But this was Jamie. The one man she knew she could trust.

The shivering got worse. “Jam….” she began to say, but suddenly he was with her again, stroking her hair and her arms, shushing reassurances. Her arms found their way around his neck and she pressed herself against him. She needed him. She needed him to overwhelm her, to chase away the fear and uncertainty that threatened to carry her away.

His breath was hot against her neck, and although she desperately wanted him to kiss her, he didn’t.

Slowly, the shivering subsided and she relaxed into a more comfortable hold. Fleeting fear still haunted her, silver shadows with huge teeth that danced at the edges of her consciousness. She needed more.

She tilted her face to him, half blind in the darkened room. She ran her fingers through his hair and felt his breath move from her neck to her forehead. Tenderly, she placed her hand on his cheek. Finally, she saw his eyes, gazing directly into hers. She kissed him softly, and his whole body stiffened. “Jamie… I need you.”

“I’m right here,” he said, as if that was the answer to all her needs.

Her needs were coursing through her veins, heightened by the fear and uncertainty of the strange storm. “Jamie…” she whispered, rolling onto her back and pulling him on top of her, “I need you.”

He kissed her then, the kind of kiss that happens without thought, only innate desire and trust. She wrapped her legs around him, glorying in the feel of his body pressing hers into the bed. His kisses traced a line from her chin down her throat, barely pausing to brush the fullness of her breasts before returning to cover her mouth with his. She fumbled to untie her bikini top and he reached to help her, undoing the knot with a single tug. She squirmed out of her shorts as he threw his swimsuit across the room.

Impatient with the urgency of her need, Coryn reached down to guide him into her but he had already found her entrance. Another loud peal of thunder shook the house and Jamie drove into her, filling her completely and fitting his body to hers perfectly. The silver fears danced at the edge of her vision, the terror of the storm threatening to overtake her.

As if sensing her need, Jamie kissed her gently as he rocked into her. “I’ve got you, Coryn. Everything’s going to be all right.”

She surrendered then, the silver flashes turning to stars as the sensations coursed through her blood. She felt as if her body itself was turning into a thousand points of light, slowly transforming her until she floated in a celestial sea. There was no giant wave overtaking her, just a series of surging breakers that roiled over and over through their joined bodies. He was hers then, a star child whose beginning and end was intrinsically entwined with hers, a new being created of two spirits who had been separated and were now coming together at last.

The sudden flash of electric light startled them.

“Ah… the backup generator’s working,” Jamie said, still covering her, penetrating her although spent.

Coryn gazed up into the face of the man she loved. “It’s really going to be all right, isn’t it?”

As most everyone knows by now, earlier this week there was a cheestastic made-for-television movie on the SyFy channel called Sharknado. I joked “Quick! Someone put together an anthology of Sharknado erotica before the fad passes!” Well, the jokes continued from there and I eventually decided something simply had to be done.

I hope you enjoyed it.

And if you’re a writer, I hope you’ll write your own #Sharknado fanfic and link it up!